22 June 2013

Might As Well Eat Them

Perhaps you were aware of this "Modest Proposal" offered by Jonathan Swift nearly 300 years ago:

For Preventing The Children of Poor People in Ireland From Being A Burden to Their Parents or Country, and For Making Them Beneficial to The Public

The proposal?  Eat 'em.

I would like to suggest this same proposal can serve as an alternative to military humanitarian intervention; to the concern with "polluting" (who says?) the environments in Nigeria and other "oil-field" countries via spills; to the concern with starvation via drought; to the concern with the high cost of water in countries where Pepsi and Coca-Cola offer sodas cheaper than water; to concern for religious intolerance.

That is, there can be no extended or chronic suffering to humans if we simply just eat them before we take all their resources.

It seems a pretty "clean" solution and if one feels a twinge of guilt, it will only linger as long as it takes for to have the appropriate bowel movement and pick your teeth with the stapes.

Oh, and in case you were unsure who "we" is, I meant hedge fund managers, Bill Gates and Warren Buffet and then whomever they choose to share their apocalypse boat with them.

I wonder how I'll taste?

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